So I sing a song of love for Julia

Julia's Birth Story

Well, I can eat my words.  After posting here last time, I got ready for bed and opened up my book hoping to get some shut eye before the big day.  About 30 minutes later--pop!  My water broke.  All on it's own.  I guess Julia had some other plans and was just faking us out.  I called the doctor and he told us to head in to the hospital.  At that point, I felt pretty good.  The contractions hadn't started so I showered, did my hair and make-up and straightened up the house.

And then the contractions started coming.  But not where they said I'd feel them.  Right in my lower back.  I could barely sit down.  The hour I was in triage waiting for our labor and delivery room I just squirmed on the bed.  This worried me a lot as I knew back labor was a sign of a posterior position (face up).  The triage doctor confirmed my water had broken and I was 3.5 centimeters dilated, so they took us to our room.

Now, when we were going to birth classes and writing our birth plan, I really wanted to get pretty far in my labor before getting any drugs.  I imagined myself using the birthing ball, walking the hallways, even laboring in the bath.  Well friends, plans change.  I asked for the anesthesiologist as soon as we got to our room.  I could not take those contractions in my back.

Ahhhh--epidurals.  What a wonderful thing.  It was instant relief.  Once I had it, I was able to relax.  It was about 2am at that point so Jeff and I decided to sleep.  The next 6 hours I drifted in and out of sleep between getting checked.  I was progressing pretty well with just a foley balloon, so they didn't start pitocin, much to my relief.  I was surprised at how not crazy laboring was.  Probably because I had the epidural.  I kind of felt like I was cheating.  I just laid there and my body did the rest.  And I was totally ok with that.

My doctor came in at 8am and said he thought she'd be there by noon.  My contractions were coming about every 3 minutes and I was about 7 centimeters dilated.  I started mentally preparing myself to meet my daughter.

But, once again, she had other plans.  Not much changed in the next few hours.  My progression stalled out a bit so they decided to start the pitocin.  And even with the epidural, I could tell that stuff wasn't messing around.  Due to some issues with baby's heart rate, I couldn't labor on my left side so the medicine wasn't reaching that side of my body and MAN did I feel those contractions in my back.

Doctor came in again probably around 1:00 and checked how things were going.  I was fully dilated and he thought I should be ready to push soon, though I didn't have any urge to.  Then he said "Hmm" and frowned as he felt the babies head.  My fears were confirmed--she was sunny side up.  He decided to let me wait a little longer before pushing to see if she would turn.  He also said she seemed quite large--like 9 pounds or bigger large.  And that her head was pretty huge.  Not exactly what you want to hear right before you begin pushing.

At 2:00, the doctor came in suddenly, threw the lights on and said "Ok, we're going to start pushing now."  Wait, what?!  Just like that, you just get to decide?  I had essentially been chilling all day and night enjoying my drugs and now you tell me I have to do all this work with no warning?  In the words of Stephanie Tanner: How rude.

He left me, Jeff, and our nurse Sam (who I was absolutely in love with) to begin.  At first, I was thinking "This isn't so bad, I can do this."  Just a few big pushes every couple of minutes.  Those feelings changed pretty quickly after about 30 minutes of this and feeling like I was getting nowhere.  The occasional comments of "Wow, that is going to be a big head" didn't help, either.

Around 3:00, my doctor came back and meant business.  He wanted her out pronto.  I had about 6 people around me coaching me and telling me "Just a little bit harder" "Hold that!"  "There you go, Amanda!"  Plenty of times I heard "Ok, this is going to be the last one!"  It was the last one about 7 times.

Finally, at 3:42pm, out she came.  Our beautiful baby girl Julia Rose weighed 8 lbs. 6 oz, was 21 inches long, and had a full head of dark brown hair.  And they were right about that head--14 inches in circumference.  Ouch.

I couldn't believe she was finally here.  She didn't seem real to me.  I carried her for 9 months, felt every kick, push, and hiccup.  And there she was, gripping my finger with her tiny hand and staring up at me.  It was such a perfect moment.  I wanted to stay in that room forever with her and Jeff and never let it end.

The last 6 days have been pretty chaotic between visitors, doctor's appointments, and of course getting to know each other.  We're all pretty tired.  Right now I'm enjoying some rare quiet time, enjoying a cup of coffee while she sleeps.  I've never felt more unsure of myself in my life.  Even though I tried my hardest, being a mom is not something you can learn from a book.  So I'm letting my daughter show me the way.

And so the adventures begin.  Welcome Julia.  You are so loved.